Monday, January 24, 2005

Today: I Give the Movie-Going Public A Stern Talking-To

-Paris Hilton attends Sundance, Indie Cred Shoots up Ten Points. But, it comes at the expense of running into her only two natural enemies, Shanndn Doherty, and Rick Salomon.
- Snoop Dogg wants to coach the Steelers. Maybe if he got the gig, he could get them to the Superbowl next year. Fo' shizzle.
- Christina Aguilera soon to be Mrs. Bratman? How appropriate.
-The Monday Numbers:
1. Are We There Yet?- $18.5M total: $18.5M
2.Coach Carter- $11M total: $43.2M
3.Meet the Fockers- $10.2M total: $248M
4.In Good Company: $8.5M total: $28M
5.Racing Stripes: $7.06M total: $27.3M
6.Assault on Precinct 13: $7.02M total: $8.57M
7.The Phantom of the Opera: $5.01M total: $33.6M
8.White Noise: $5M total: $49.4M
9.The Aviator: $4.82M total: $58M
10.Elektra: $3.83M total: $20.2M
Can we, as American citizens, think about maybe NOT seeing Meet the Fockers for the fourth time and instead, oh, I don't know, head down to the local library and pick up a book? I don't even care if it has pictures in it. Hell, it can be a biography of Ben Stiller for all I care. But please, America, stop before this sequel that was supposed to flop makes 300 mill at the box office. I'd be really irate right now if it wasn't for the fact that at least we, as a nation, can recognize that Elektra is total crap and let it sink like the foul stone it is.
- Gawker readers have some great sketch ideas for this weeks SNL host, everyone's favorite celebutant, Paris Hilton. I hope Tina Fey is reading.
-Teri Hatcher must really miss doing those Radio Shack commercials. Apparently, she snubbed her co-stars at a Desperate Housewives event. However, it seems the rest of the Housewives decided to snub the media that showed up to interview them for the event.
-And after they snub, the Housewives look to cash in.
- Audrey Toutou is the latest to join the cast of The DaVinci Code, the book that was sure to become a movie the second Nelson DeMille praised it. She'll be starring opposite Tom Hanks and a bunch of paintings.
- The Mouse Gets its Own 24-Hour News Network. Disney launches ABC News Now. The rumbling of CNN's stomach can be heard in the distance
- This shocking report questions the stability of J.L-Jennifer Lopez and her wifehusband Marc Anthony's marriage.
- Well at least Kate Moss and Pete Doherty have something in common to talk about. They can share drug bust stories! Aw, that's so romantic.
- Has someone been spying on Nicole Kidman?It's probably those damn Scientologists.
- Is Drew Barrymore looking to get married again? I doubt Fabrizio will write 'drew I love you' on his bum or design purses with Monica Lewinsky.
-Stop Ashlee Update:closing in on 200,000 signatures. Unfortunately, the petition is hard to take seriously when some of the signatures include Britney Spears, President Bush, Nick Lachey, and Bart Simpson. But hey, at least we're trying, right?
- The Pitt Split is Profitable for Everyone! Timely t-shirts that you will only be able to wear until Brad is officially shacking up with Angelina. Then, to the thrift store they go.
-I can finally watching Trading Spaces again Paige Davis, who has taken a page (haha get it?) out of Cyndi Lauper's book on how to be incredibly irritating, is leaving the show. Apparently they're looking to try a hostless format on for size, but I'm hoping they'll find Alex doing off-Broadway plays or something and convince her to host again.
- Predictably, Catwoman racks up the Razzie nominations, with a total of seven.
-For those of you who are jersey x core, welcome to the apocalypse.
-Why can't we all just be friends? Tara Reid, apparently thinking she's 14 again, was on TRL today throwing snowballs at pictures of Lindsay Lohan or something. Now Tara, don't get testy. We all know Paris likes Lohan better anyway.


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