Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Would You Want Jessica Simpson's Advice?

It looks like Jessica just can't take it anymore. She's been seeing a therapist because all this gossip about her marriage being destroyed is, uh...actually destroying her marriage. Ironic. But the most interesting part of this article (although it's more of a blurb, really) is that Jessica mentions that "I would be a therapist if I weren't an entertainer."
Woah. Let's slow down here. Jessica Simpson, lisenced therapist? How could that possibly go well? I don't know if Jessica realizes that being a therapist means she has to string sentences together coherently that aren't already written for her. I can only imagine the things she would say to a suicidal patient, or (heh) a couple in need of marriage counseling.
"We don't even sleep in the same bed anymore. Is this normal, Dr. Simpson?" they might ask.
"That's perfectly natural, y'all! Me and my husband haven't slept in the same bed for three years! In fact, I don't even think we live with each other anymore. I'd have to ask my daddy about that."
Yes, I can see Jessica flourishing in the field of therapy. It's too bad she's got such a strong acting career, otherwise she might want to think about switching fields.


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